During the holiday season, one can look forward to many things – drunken relatives, overeating, that pervasive bloated feeling, and giving the environment a good kick. But nothing can really prepare you for the dreaded ‘tacky gift’. Worse than useless, these knickknacks are so tacky as to be horrifying – you want to look away, but you just can’t. Momentarily stunned speechless, you quickly attempt to recover by blurting out a feeble “Ooooh…cool!”, not wanting to seem ungrateful, while hoping that your comment won’t be interpreted as a sign that you’d like more of the same next year.
My mother found a real doozy this year. Thankfully, in a fit of reason normally unheard of at the holiday season, she explained that she knew it was hideously tacky but just couldn’t help herself. She found it for 4 bucks at a craft fair and bought it just for fun, fully expecting me to hoof it to the Good Will come boxing day.
Dear readers, I give you, the über tacky…shoe pillow:
In case you’re blinded by the fire engine red shaggy plush and seductively sheer ruffle, the multi-coloured embroidered text reads: New Shoes cure the Blues!
And no, the white leopard print isn’t part of the tack-tastic package. It’s just sitting on a fabulous chair that I hauled out of the garbage at my apartment. Bonus.
